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Its all your standard-issue psycho stuff.
Joe also judges Becks friends for drinking skinny girl cocktails.
JOE, YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS THIN.
You dont get to trash women who opt for low-calorie beverages.
Theres a reason Rory ditched Dean for Jess.
But this is not Joes way.
He even crafts her a caption: Bitches being our most authentic selves.
Someone whose name rhymes with iconic American novelist J.D.
Or, well, he tries to.
I will give Joe points for his disgust at Peachs interior-design stylings: Gauche?
If this is the fruit (lol) of Peachs imagination theres no telling what horrors shes capable of.
Joes prescription:The Count of Monte Cristo.
It is, Joe assures him, about revenge, and more importantly, living with the enemy.
Time for the swanky party!
so, theres that.
While Roger charms Beck, Peach just trashes Joe for working in the pale and flaccid book business.
(Im digging her power accessories, by the way.)
A series of extremely improbable things happen next involving Peachs possessions.
For one thing, I dont believe she would bring her laptop to this party.
But here we are, all of us together, and each one of these things does happen.
She knows Joe took it.
(No offense, Kristen Stewart!
But we can all agree: Bella is lame as hell.
Her interests are like … laundry?
As Blythe might ask, does the character weve met really support that narrative?
Or because Beck is poor?
This is not totally explained, but no matter, Joe is quite distraught.
I didnt really and what I did read wasnt that special!
Beck, when it happened, he was in an airport.
Are the best lines of this program wasted on Peach?
Beck comes back to Joes place to do a sad doorway lean and apologize.
Joe understands his only option is to do a murder.
And also Peach LITERALLY just acted out this fake almost-suicide, it would be perfect!
No that Im encouraging; Im justsaying, if youre going to do it, do it right.
Peach, as Joe will soon discover, survives this amateur non-assassination.
Wonder what shell remember when she comes to in the ER!
When Joe gets home, he finds his saddest little neighbor tried to kill Ron.
Should he call 911?
Not if you ever want to see your mother again!
On the bright side, this is a great alibi for the whole Peach situation.
