The Real Housewives of Potomac
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There have been a lot of grifters and liars in theReal Housewivesgame.
The Grand Dame is now the Grand Dette.
Plus, theres the arrival of a new Housewife, Candaice … who we dont see at all.
Its been a while since Ive checked in with these ladies, so lets get to it.
First things first, the grand tax evasion of Karen and her husband.
The show checks in on Karen in her positively palatial house in Great Falls.
Shes Gatsby trapped in this giant house.
So shes going to call her sister on camera and talk about it.
Gizelle shows up to lunch with Ashley in a simply preposterous gold romper.
I feel like Gizelles style got stuck somewhere between 2004 Beyonce and 2010 Beyonce.
Neither Beyonce really had it figured out, and both Beyonces loved a gold moment.
Gizelle is still with Sherman, and Ashley is still in a complicated, weird relationship with her husband.
Shes been living alone in an apartment for about six months.
During a fight, he took her stuff out of the closet and told her to get out.
Ashley, baby, what are you fighting for?
Also, Ashley keeps buying her mother things and giving her money, and thats a problem for Michael.
I think this is the one issue where Im Team Ashley.
Let her mama have a house.
Monique is at her new house, and shes unpacking and feeding the fish in the built-in aquarium.
They had a five-bedroom house and two kids, but that wasnt enough space, so theyve upgraded.
Thats not usually a cute image.
Its usually the image of the lack of agency of women, not like family values.
I feel like being called a heifer isnt an unforgivable sin.
you could work through that.
Up next is Robyn and Juan.
Juan got a new job as a head coach at Coppin State, an HBCU in Baltimore.
Its unclear if theyre back together or in a relationship.
Can you imagine being on the phone with an emotional Karen for three hours?
I would throw myself off a bridge.
Robyn is going to sit down for lunch with Karen.
Shes saying that Karen wants to thank her, but Robyn secretly wants the dirt.
Get that dirt, Robyn.
Ashley is packing up her little single-girl pad to go back to Michael.
In the past, Michael would disrespect her and she would lash out and threaten to leave constantly.
Michaels got a hottie on his arm and Ashleys got access to that joint bank account.
What is there to keep?
Ashley, its bad and aint nobody trying to keep eating emu.Also, is Charisse the Kim of Potomac?
Karen is at home and shes putting out packaged muffins and claiming to be domestic.
What is Karendoing?This is sad and weird.
Ray says he mentioned it to her.
ITS NOT ADDING UP.
Serialseason three: What did Karen know and when did she know it?
They sit down with a couple of Corona Lights to talk about their marriage.
They have to draw boundaries between them and the business and between Michaels bank account and Ashleys mother.
They claim to have an unbreakable bond and thats what matters.
Then Robyn sits down with Karen for lunch and this woman has lost it.
Shes become a defensive soundboard version of herself.
Karen says the following things:
You have to make millions to owe millions.
What is a blog?
The WashingtonPostis an institution and its an honor to be named in an institution.
Im debt-free and loaded.
This woman is fully unhinged.
