The Real Housewives of Potomac
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Good lord, I want them all to succeed even though their business ventures are vague.
Can someone just free them of the dumb men in their lives?
If someone could also free them from the nonsensical drama of event invites, that would also be great.
Up first is Karen going out to dinner with Ray.
She breaks down while talking about her mothers battle with Alzheimers and you cant get mad at that.
Youcanget mad at the alleged nonprofit status of her charity.
Gizelle and Ashley are going jewelry shopping for a gift for Robyn to celebrate her event.
Meanwhile, Ashley keeps obliviously asking about Sherman and Gizelle finally opens up to her about their breakup.
According to Gizelle, he doesnt want to do the work on the relationship all the time.
When you have kids, thats gotta be important.
Shit, its important when all you have is a Neopet and a succulent garden.
Ashley wants to tell Gizelle about Shermans Park After Dark scandal, but maybe now is not the time.
Like … bitch, thats what hes supposed to do.
Theres more to say about their relationship dynamic, but well get to that.
Shes having an afternoon stroll with a new friend: Shermans ex-wife, Kyndall.
This is nothing but messiness.
They get to shit on Sherman and they get to talk about Gizelle.
They insist that its a violation of the Girl Code to date your friends ex.
Yall are damn near 50 and youve been divorced for almost half a decade.
Its time for the dueling events!
Charisse has also chosen to defect over to Moniques event.
I guess everyone wanted to wear a gown.
Once shes extended the invitation, everyone starts asking who to make the check out to.
Karen says just to make it out to her FOR-PROFIT BUSINESS.
What in the world?
Her response to the questions: I can do whatever the fuck I wanna do.
Tell the IRS that.
Suddenly the show turns intoFlip or Flop: Potomacand Im not mad.
I would watch a real-estate based spinoff featuring Robyn.
If Juan was on it, it would have less angry tension than the realFlip or Flop.
Just going to see a ballroom and some tablecloths.
This girl does not need a wedding venue.
She needs deep, deep therapy.
She wants to cover the ceiling in flowers.
Next, Monique heads to the salon with Chris to get mani-pedis.
Chris literally says, I would much prefer you to be home with the kids every day.
When are you going to give me more babies?
WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?
WHAT YEAR IS IT?
This is all presented with no irony or awareness.
Chris also says, You have been looking after me, so do something for yourself.
Not you deserve to be fulfilled as a human with ambitions.
Nope, just your career is a trade-off for taking care of me, a full grown man.
THEN COMES ASHLEY AND MICHAEL.
What is there even to say?
Then he outright denies that hes open to children.
Theres financial problems and possibly some drug issues (either her mothers boyfriend or her mothers own issues).
NONE OF THOSE THINGS are Ashleys fault.
NONE OF THOSE THINGS prevent Ashley from providing a good home to her future children.
Its quite another to say, Your mother was a bad mother and you might be too.
Ashley just needs to LEAVE HIM.
Finally, its time for Karens event.
Shes invited Kyndall and Carson Kressley for some reason.
As Robyn says Its not an ambush.
Im ready to receive the message.
