The Real Housewives of New York City
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This is not so much a recap of an episode as it is a recap of a scene.
It is the ne plus ultraofReal Housewivesevents.
Sonja retorted with, Oh, weve heard that before, and the whole event quickly descended into chaos.
Ramona immediately chastises Sonja and says, Say youre sorry.
Say youre sorry because I want her to come to my party.
Dennis, who is a very handsome man, is about 20 years too old for this sweater.
Im with Bethenny, I would have thrown that out faster than Kanye West will block you on Twitter.
(They are also given Andy Cohens cell phone number and a too-long brownfaux-fur vest.)
Much more daring is Luanns take on Mrs. Peacocks outfit fromCluebut in magenta.
It has a tsunami of feathers protruding both from the neck and the cuffs of this sweater.
(Or is it a dress?
Ramona is also dressed in a floral dress with square grommets all around the strangely shaped cutouts.
Its like whatever was born nine months after Dee Dee Ramone came all over someones Laura Ashley couch.
Dennis isnt the only man at the party.
Ramonas new friend Kirk is also there, and he seems like he is playing co-host the entire time.
But Kirk is tall, handsome, fit, well-dressed, slightly greying, and generally amused.
Hes like Mario Part 2: The Squeakuel.
He is absolutely perfect for her and she should not screw this up.
Speaking of Dennis, he inspires what is my personal favorite moment of the whole dinner.
Bethenny chimes in, You know how we met, or at least you think you do.
Bethenny reminds Luann of this fact.
This is him, she says.
This is the guy.
While doing this, she is nodding and also swallowing hard, trying to figure out what to do.
The best part is the whole time her neck is encased in this ridiculous halo of pink feathers.
I honestly dont think that the Countess was trying to start shit with Dennis at dinner.
I just think she was completely ignorant of his identity.
The next kerfuffle happens thanks to Sonja and Dorinda.
Dorinda pipes up and says shes not dating Rocco.
(Be careful to not say her name three times or else she will appear.)
Does she have insider information?
Is there something she knows that shes not telling us?
Sonja has never met a molehill she did not climb to the top of and proclaim to be Everest.
Sonja says that she does not lie.
Morgan is a more sex-positive bang out.
She likes to have a good time with a variety of men and everyone knows it.
She is not ashamed of it.
She doesnt steal guys from her friends.
She is what we call in the biz an ethical slut.
But whenever shes wronged someone, they all go to this place to point out how promiscuous she is.
As someone says, it is the perfect punch line to the entire incident.
Ramona, of course, is only concerned about her flatware during this entire fight.
No matter how many times people tell Ramona that shes the apologizer, she refuses to listen.
Thats why I think Sonja is getting a bad rap this season.
She sends Ramona a text that takes up an entire iPhone screen.
That, right there, should be a medically diagnosable ailment.
