The Real Housewives of Atlanta
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With this season ofReal Housewives of Atlantabrewing, there have tons of news stories swirling around the series.
Is Kenya coming back to the show?
Is Porsha really pregnant?
Where are the joggers?
September came and went, Sheree!
Who is getting that sixth peach?
This bitch stands up and shouts ME!
when the gals ask who has been in an open relationship.
I already love her.
Before we can meet Shamari, weve got to catch up on a lot.
Lets get to it.
First things first, lets declare a winner for the new tag lines this season.
How could it be anyone other than NeNe?
Im the glue for my wig and my family?
Its beautiful in its perplexity.
SHE is the GLUE for her WIG?
In this metaphor, NeNe is the thing keeping her wig on her own head?
Take that, Roxxxy Andrews.
Everyone is coupled up and both Cynthia and Porshas stories about their new relationships are positively bonkers.
Porsha keeps acting like hes got the kind of wealth that is generational and significant.
The dude owns a couple hookah lounges.
All of this could go away in an instant, Porsha.
I hope hes investing.
Dennis says that he sold 2,000 hot dogs last week, so theres no budget.
Cynthias new boyfriend is Mike Hill, a sportscaster for Fox Sports.
Its possible he only exists inside Cynthias phone.
Cynthia, this is the person youre trusting with your romantic destiny?
The real emotional core of the episode, and Im sure the season, is NeNe and Gregg.
Gregg was suddenly diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer.
NeNe has stepped in to be his caretaker.
She is dealing with his illness by just crying in her car.
Also, Gregg tells her at one point that colon-wise, Im good.
Porsha visits NeNe at her boutique and NeNe is getting ready to open another boutique called Swaggalicious.
Porsha tries on a few things and tells NeNe that shes got a friend.
My friends do not do that for me.
NeNe is going to Miami for a stand-up gig.
Theyre still letting her do stand-up?
Who is paying real money to go see NeNe?
So, Porsha decides to rally the girls and head to Miami to support NeNe.
If they just happen to be in Miami for her proposal too, thats even mo better.
But Porsha will have to call Kandi.
Their relationship is …strained.Theyve just reached a point where theyre icy but friendly.
Kandi and the rest of Xscape is in Los Angeles getting the Golden Note Award from ASCAP.
Kandi seems to be a fine mother who is involved in her kids lives.
Riley seems to think that Kandi is too busy to have another kid.
Any lectures about parenting commitment need to be directed at Todds unemployed ass.
Kandi is out there performing in silk kimonos for your benefit, Riley.
A fun fact given to us by this episode is Kandi has a ringback tonethat she recorded.
Shes doing a family photoshoot.
Shes three weeks from her wedding and has an adorable two month old.
Her baby is still a very cute blob.
Give this baby a spin-off.
The smize will never die.
Good one, Cynthia.
Lets head to Miami!
Porsha is, of course, the first to arrive in Miami with her boyfriend.
This tenuous relationship between Kandi and Porsha is about to crumble.
Porsha runs into the bathroom to call her sister and forgets to turn down the volume.
Calling your sister from the bathroom immediately before getting engaged is a very relatable move.
TO BE CONTINUED…
