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Its his way of celebrating having lasted ten years in the business.
Your intro to live comedy was bailing on Dave Chappelle.It was December 2004, finals time freshman year.
Some guy barked me into the Cellar, and Chappelles onstage in front of maybe 15 or 20 people.
I had my backpack on and he says, Sir, were going to have to inspect your bag.
Your skins a little too olive.
A huge, huge laugh.
I sat down for maybe 20 minutes but I had to go.
I had a fucking exam.
I always thought about comedy from then on, but I never thought it was something I could do.
Weve known each other for ten years, too.
My first text to you is an invite to hang out with Donald Glover in 2010.
But you were in New Jersey and too tired.I was living with my parents in Parsippany.
I graduated from NYU a year before.
They would teach you how to do something in five minutes.
And then my cousin worked as a temp at Bloomberg in Jersey.
So I took that for like six to eight months.
While I was there, I realized I was in existential crisis.
It was the financial crisis of 2009.
I remember I was temping with, like, a Princeton Ph.D. people just bridging the time.
On a Bloomberg terminal, I messaged the top boss asking for career help.
I ended up with an internship at EDC.
That dovetailed with me starting comedy, and being in the city.
You bring five people, you get five minutes.
Like 16 of my cousins came.
The Indian Bat-Signal is real.None of them were even clued in on anything I was doing.
Hillary had just lost.
It was like six months after Obamas inauguration.
So fucked up, when I think about it now.
I did that for like three minutes and I didnt bomb.
I thought,Where are other open mics?
Im ready for this shit.I ate a dick so hard.
But it was like,Oh, okay.
Thats what it is.
You got better, but so did the scene.
Matchless was such a capsule of the scene when we were coming up.
Everyone who went through there was just insane.
Matchless was the greatest place to do a comedy show.
It was a perfect place.
Hang out, smoke some weed in the back.
It did feel like having people over, because people would bring in their food or drinks from elsewhere.
Its like youre talking about youre just talking.
And Matchless is where I got better at doing that.
You didnt really have Indian role models.
How did you carry your Indian-ness into your growth?Im the most diverse Indian there is, man.
My voice is black, my life is white, my legs are chicken.
Youre always saying Im abrasive or salty.
I have some thoughts, too.
They were a classic case of thinking youre doing the right thing without thinking things through.
It made me realize I was right for pursuing the wrong side of the joke.
The wrong side is harder and funnier.
Its easy to be on the right side.
It doesnt require thought.
It only requires Google.
Maybe a month of that.
And there was another one period of time where I wasnt as conversational.
That was purely joke, joke, joke, joke, joke.
That was more wording, more a function of figuring out what I want to do in stand-up.
As an intern at theEDC, you know you couldnt wear jeans and a tee.
Your thing was sophistication with street sense, the sophisticationofstreet sense.
Now you tell your Camus joke in between cussing.
And you do a quiet Miranda Priestly voice to force people to listen harder.
A friend calls it Vin Diesel on lean.I wish I had recognized that earlier.
I feel like thats more my comedy now.
I know enough about things to talk about them, but not enough to be arrogant about it.
Its a fun and challenging line to walk.
Thats also why I do comedy.
In your career, comedians have always tweeted.
The audience has always had smartphones.
Did you ever think,Im done?The well is dry.
Comedy defeated me.After the Oscars I thought every job on the planet would call.
And then two more sets that night.
Besides everything, what do you miss aboutSNL?The popcorn.
I didnt have a lot of stuff there besides my plants, which I brought home.
I brought two to four guests per show.
Mind you, I have 16 first cousins, a sister, and a fiance.
The same 16 cousins?
Kenan I would watch as a kid, onAll That.My mom knows Kenan.
He was only 25!Hes a genius.
One of the greatest, if not the greatest, sketch comedians of all time.
Hed dissect a sketch between dress and air.
He was the best, is the best.
Even with every wild thing Ive experienced, I cannot believe I met him.
When my mom met Kenan I was like,Cool, Im done.My photo is on the wall there.
Larry David and Hannibal Buress were also one and done.
Im in good company.
How did you keep at it?Chris [Rock] told me I was really funny.
That was my oh shit moment.
He was probably the first comedian I quoted in high school.
And he thought I was funny.
Youre texting right now, helping a buddy polish jokes.
But I would be honored and Im hopeful that that has happened.
Maybe he could be the Michael B. Jordan of Nimesh Patels!
Someone just started comedy in New York.
To them, youve always been doing it.
Youre a fixture of accomplishment.Im just trying to stay humble, hungry, and working.
Keeping that its my first day mentality, and keeping in mind all Ive learned about comedy and myself.
This interview has been edited and condensed.
