Murphy Brown

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On TV, none other thanAvery Brownis reporting Donald J. Trump has won the presidency.

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Zoom out from the Earth from space, zoom in to the Womens March on January 20, 2018.

(Why not, I more or less wrote those months off myself.)

Were at Phils, everyone!

Lets all come in from the cold.

Were at war now.)

And how many phone numbers did that get him?

He called one, presumably 1-888-SOLANAS, and now he owns a timeshare in Boca.

Corky arrives without a hat butwearing Ivanka Trump pumps, $1 a shoe.

Anyway, they all miss reporting.

THE SHITTY MEDIA MEN ALWAYS DO, FRANK.

Whatever, ignore him.

Maybe they should think about going back on the air?

Cut to primal scene: Millennial moves back home.

They already have one, Murphy says.

(Shes right,The Connerspremieres next month.)

So thats Averys news!

Wolf Channel competitor CNC is onboarding the gang.

The problem its a Greek tragedy!

is that theyre airing in the same time slot, from 7:00 AM to 9:00 AM.

No way, she says.

And they turn away from each other and say in unison, You aresogoing down.

The game is afoot!!

(Thats definitely fromThe Odyssey.)

doesnt sound so flattering.

Id be into that.

Living in the Watergate Hotel, looking like Nixon in his final days.

Upon departure, he immediately relapsed: he looked at Twitter.

The thought of going back to work on cable news reduces Miles to a quivering lump on the floor.

But they know he misses journalism, and he misses them, too, right?

A great quotation I once read is Family is a car crash from which the victims never recover.

T-minus one week, touring the CNC digs, meeting the social media coordinator.

Corky says, Im guessing thats you?

and our guy Pat Patel says, You assume that because Im Indian Im the tech guy?

Is this an SJW joke?

We know Pat Patels a millennial because he fondles Murphys flip phone with reverence.

But its gotta go.

Vain like a thoroughbred.

So, is this new morning show a step down?

Maybe not, because Murphy still gets a secretary, andtheyre sending up a candidate now.

(This will make the 98th secretary through the revolving door.)

Its Hill sorry,its Hilary-with-one-L Clinton.

Shes wearing a red pantsuit.

Shes overqualified for this job.

Murphy will call her.

We let the woman take a bow.

Ugh, Averys show involves traveling around the country and giving the real people the platform they never get.

She just won The Dozens.

Okay, Averys going to help Set Up Her FaceUnion Twttr.

What should be her new handle?

Hello, Twitter people!

she types, and this is the best first tweet Ive ever seen.

She hits that button, against Averys advice, with true relish.

Its Chekhovs Tweet its gotta go viral in the next scene.

Go to bed, Avery.

Mommy has work to do.

T-minus ten minutes to SHOWTIME!

Frank reads aloud, Nobody remembers who Old Murphy is.

She attacks me to get publicity and, in the voice all of us have been practicing Sad!

Is Murphy worried that he hits back 10 times harder?

Nope, and heres the money shot: You bring it on!

Cut to Murphy who still wears very great pajamas!

lamenting to Avery that she Became the Thing She Despises.

Since, you know, it was Good Television, but not Real Journalism.

This isnt right, she says.

I dont deserve these numbers.

Avery scoffs, Yeah, but you got em!

and that isnot supportive,Avery.

Youre not supposed to agree.

Ive got my eye on you.

& Assorted

There are a LOT of unnecessary Kids These Days jokes.

Protest marches are the new eggs Benedict, Phils sister Phyllis says.

Youre my wine charm, Phyllis.

But there is no mention of the fact that Corky and Milesused to be married.

I also liked Murphys ORIGINAL NASTY WOMAN sweatshirt.

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