Jane the Virgin
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I have to say, this may be close to my platonic ideal of aJane the Virginepisode.
Theres a surfeit of Jane/Petra scenes, a gift we get all too rarely.
All that,andAlba gets a vibrator!
What did we ever do to deserve this show?
It is may be the longest withheld consummation ofanyrelationship where the couple in question already has a 5-year-old son.
But then they ended up in a shower together?
And they seem very happy!
Shower sex is better than car sex?
This must be more of a fantasy world than Id previously understood.
Its especially easy to do when you get such an embarrassment of riches among all the other characters.
Petra has good reason for her controlling persona.
Shes in charge ofa lot, and terrible things keep happening to her!
Of course shes brusque!
I continue to have high hopes for their friendship.
The story issosilly, and Brooke Shieldss River is so great.
Obviously … no, sorry, that still makes no sense whatsoever.
kindly give me the AmericanizedPassions of Santosstarring River Shields and Rogelio de la Vega as quickly as possible.
For the record: There issome disagreementon the existence ofmale postpartum depression.
But River should at least do some reading before she dismisses Rogelio entirely.
Which is why Jane buys her a vibrator and slips it into her purse when Albas not looking.
Of course theres an inevitable moment of embarrassment when Alba finds the vibrator in an unfortunately public way.
Many congratulations, Alba, on your journey to self-discovery!
JR announces that shesdonewith them, and smashes her glorious stiletto heel through her burner phone.
The gloved hand putting the mueller screws (which are areal thing!)
But you know what?
This week Im giving that position of honor to something else.
And then the door closes as she undoes Petras bathrobe.
Petras new haircut!?
Anyhow, oooh, PETRA LIKES JR!To be continued!
From Our Narrator, With Love:
Hello #Jafael shippers!
MOVE YOUR HEAD!!
he shouts at Jane.
Ill never be a Chris, Rafael says, sadly.
I mean, way to generalize about Chris, the Narrator retorts.
Our Narrators thoughts on edible underwear: Am I the only one getting hungry?!
River Shields tries to make the exotic-animal presentation about her feud with Rogelio.
This is not your segment,RIVER, Rogelio spits at her.
I AM CALLING ON MY 14 MILLION TWITTER AND INSTAGRAM FOLLOWERS.
GO ONLINE AND ATTACK HER.
River does lose a toe in the wolf attack.
