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(Chris Hemsworth inVacationdoesnt count.)
How to See Chris Pines Pubes
1.
Like a great chef,Outlaw Kingknows not to blow its showstopper on the first course.
Accordingly, before the movie will serve you the D, its going to serve you the bush.
There are duels to fight, people to stab, and Englishmen to glare at.
Amuse yourself by trying to figure out whose Scottish accent is the best.
(Its not Pines.)
But the time is apparently right, and so tonight is thenight.
When the two start to embrace, keep your eyes trained at the bottom of the frame.
Now, this scene also features female nudity, but thats not what youre here for today.
Youre here for pubes.
Keep your eyes firmly trained between the royal cum gutters, and gaze at the majesty of this mound.
Drink it in on the spectrum ofmale celebrity pubes, its more Pattinson than Theroux.
Alternately, you could also skip the above steps and just fast-forward on Netflix to 45:31.
But come on, dont you want some build up?
How to See Chris Pines Penis
1.
Now that weve handled the pubes, its time to move a few inches south.
Just a warning: To see the dick youre going to sit through a lot more movie.
Like, basically an entire Heros Journeys worth.
This is the part McKenzie trimmed, for good reason.
After that, he takes a cleansing bath in what looks like an extremely cold Scottish firth.
This is what youve been waiting for.
Luckily, you have an advantage that everyone watching the movie at TIFF didnt have a pause button.
Feel free to go back and watch it again and again.
Make an event of it.
Its been a rough week.
