American Horror Story
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Could it be a witch?!
If you dont see what Im getting at here, I am calling this woman a witch.
But anyway, Venable is jealous and lacks impulse control.
Girl, we all feel jealous sometimes, but the solution is never a mass grave.
That reads as a little dramatic, especially if youre donning an updo and an impeccably sharp velvet suit.
She even remembers receiving apples as a treat from some lame suburbanite.
This involves killing a bunch of cannibals and then stowing away on a horse-drawn carriage.
For the record, it is far too easy to break into the Outpost.
You mean to tell me all you should probably do is hide under some boxcar and youre in there?
Im starting to believe the people of the Outpost are too trusting and that is their fatal flaw.
Of course, this brings me to the masquerade ball.
Coco interacts with a masked man who she believes to be Langdon.
Lacking subtlety or shame, Coco offers him butt stuff in exchange for a ticket to the Sanctuary.
But its not Langdon, its Brock, the man she left to die in the nuclear holocaust.
And hes not the same Brock … because hes missing several fingers and hes managing infections that never heal.
He returns the favor by stabbing her square in the head.
Honestly, Im impressed with his arm strength.
The human skull is thick to protect the brain, and he pierced it with one swift movement.
Say what you will about the apocalypse, but you cant get that muscular density at Barrys Bootcamp.
Maybe Im a prude, but bobbing for apples sounds lame as hell.
I dont care if its the last game on Earth whats entertaining about simulating waterboarding and swapping bacteria?
No, thank you!
Especially since Im not currently dry heaving in a windowless bunker.
Kudos to Ryan Murphy because this vomit scene gavetheStand by Mepie-eating contesta run for its money.
I mean, just look what happened to Brocks hairline!
Id take my chances with a stomach bug.
Venable and Miriam are delighted that their mass murders have gone according to plan.
This, my friends, is why you trust no one, especially not androids you didnt personally program.
Everything has a point.
Its gonna be a fight between the Antichrist and the witches!
